Frustration

Let me start off by saying I am not frustrated with Hudson or Ben.  My boys bring me so much happiness!!!

Now...my frustration is every 3 weeks the attending neonatologists rotate...well we only had the last doctor for 2 weeks.  So to my surprise today was a new doctor.  Lots of questions up in the air right now as she evaluates Hudson and gets to know him.  The bad thing is there are so many neonatologists that in the almost 13 weeks we've been in the NICU we've never had her...I was unable to be at rounds today, so hopefully tomorrow I'll get some answers.  Tomorrow he'll have his 3rd eye check up after his laser treatment to see how he is doing and he'll also be having a study done to see what type of oxygen he'll need to go home on if he were to go home in the next few days.

...Going home in the next few days...I wish I knew!  Two doctors ago she wouldn't touch the question with when we'd go home because Hudson hadn't had surgery yet.  This last doctor's goal was to have him out by the 21st...and we've had about five other doctors give us estimated discharge dates...all being anywhere from the 21st thru 31st...well the new doctor doesn't seem to think it will be in that time frame.  Thus I'm frustrated!  As much as I'd love to have Hudson home for the holidays, if it is best for him to be in the hospital for a few weeks longer to help him get stronger and a greater chance of not coming home on oxygen then Ben and I are for it.  Big picture...we've been here 12 weeks now, what is another 2.  But ultimately we can't even say a date at this time.  I asked how long of a notice would we get before he got discharged so we could make sure everything was in order at home...a few days notice.  Sorry, I'm rambling.

Good news:)  Hudson has taken all of his feedings today by bottle and drank them all!  He's getting frustrated with the slow flow nipple and will probably go to a regular nipple at one of his next feedings.

In weaning Hudson's oxygen down, he was moved from half a liter oxygen at 23% today to a quarter liter oxygen at 100% .  Sounds confusing huh?  I thought so too!  Basically the "home" oxygen tanks can't make 23%, only 100%.  It's depended on the flow needed...whether it is a liter, half liter, quarter liter...not sure if it goes below that.  Another reason this study tomorrow will help determine what exactly he needs.

MRI.  From the beginning of Hudson's life...or within the first two weeks.  He had 2 head ultrasounds checking for bleeding on the brain.  He didn't have any.  However, he did have a spot that they noticed and wanted to follow up with a MRI closer to his gestational birth date.  Every doctor is different, I get that.  But...I figure for good reason the doctor wanted a MRI to make sure the spot was nothing or hadn't gotten bigger , etc...today's doctor said he didn't need the MRI, if it were anything significant we would have known there was a problem by now.  Ehhhhh!  Wrong answer!

I am a pleasant person and I love my son more than anything...but you mess with him...you mess with me!  I will be kind and I will listen, but I will make sure Hudson has the best care and everything is checked!

And Hudson weighs 7lbs 1oz...he lost some ounces...but eating on his own burns some calories!  He'll be back up in a day or so!

And Hudson's bottom...it's raw!  Poor kid has had every experiment done to it but nothing seems to clear it up...he's had it exposed to fresh air, to oxygen, etc...

Prayers for Hudson's bottom and lungs and for my attitude.  At least I'm honest and can admit when I have a bad attitude!

Hugs from the Murray's!